Coffee, Fries, Files and Golf Balls

From 15-18 I had quite a few different jobs, never staying at one place for too long, either getting bored, or getting fired.

My first job was the summer before I turned 16. I got a job at Timothy's Coffee in the Supercentre. It was so cool working there. All of my friends hung out there, so I got to see them all the time, never missing out on what was going to be happening after work, always having someone to talk to when it got quiet.

I actually enjoyed working there. My boss was a bit of a bitch, but for the most part we worked alone, so I did not have to deal with her much. I got to know a lot of new people, others who worked at the Supercentre, and just regulars to the coffee shop.

There was however, this thirtysomething creep that worked in the grocery store in the mall. He thought he was a real hot shot, and flirted with all the ladies. My boss thought he was great, she was prone to these ridiculous giggle fits whenever he was around. Then one afternoon he offered to give me a ride home, and I naively accepted.

The creep pulled into the park near my house and was trying to kiss me with this disgusting, bushy, moustached covered mouth, and was trying to feel me up. I kept trying to get him off me, but not putting up too much of a struggle, since that only seemed to get him hotter. He only agreed to take me home when I bullshitted him, promising that if he let me go home I would go out with him some time, and we could really get it on. As soon as he dropped me in front of the house I turned around, gave him the one finger salute and said "Fuck You Asshole". I was quite proud of myself.

The next few days I worked The Creep avoided the store completely. It wasn't until my boss was in with me that he came in for a coffee. The two of them went off in a corner to have a very intimate conversation, and about 15 minutes later I was fired. Bitch Boss told me she had received complaints I was being rude to customers. Yeah right.

So I did the most mature thing I could think of in my very wise 15 and a half years. I went outside and keyed the creeps fancy little red sports car. I am still proud of that. I just wish I had the guts to pull a Carrie Underwood on it. That would have been more fun.

The next job I had was at White Rose Nursery's. Nothing too exciting there. Truthfully, the only thing I really remember about that job was the smell of Eucalyptus. I love that smell.

When I got bored there I quit and took a job at Saratoga Fries in the Burlington Mall. That was fun while it lasted, my friend Michelle worked at the Orange Julius next door, and my friend Monica worked in the store with me. Working at the Burlington Mall was more fun than the Supercentre, more people hung out there. And free fries....YUM! Sadly though, the job only lasted about 3 weeks, before my boss caught me making out with a guy in the back of the store after hours. I was promptly fired.

Much to my parents chagrin, it was months before I took another job. The following summer I worked about 2 weeks at Longo's, got bored, took a job at Caz's Fish and Chips, couldn't stand the smell and quit that.

Are you sensing the pattern here?

That fall, just before I turned 17 I got a job at Gerrie Electric as a File Clerk. NOW I was in my element. I was actually good at this stuff! I worked 3 hours after school, 3 days a week and Saturdays. Still totally had a social life, I worked alone, and my parents were off my back.

I loved the job. It was a little mundane, mostly just filing and mailing invoices, but I was quick and efficient, and my bosses seemed to like me.

I met some pretty cute guys there too. There was some renovations being done, and this one worker there was so hot. I used every excuse I could think of to walk by him. He called me Blue Eyes and flirted his ass of with me. Made going to work that much more fun.

And then there was this other guy who worked in the store, and was often there on Saturdays. He would come back and see me and we'd talk about things. Sometimes after everyone else was gone we'd make sure all the doors were locked and we'd smoke a joint or two and make out a bit. Must not have been to memorable though, I don't recall what his name was.

Eventually, things started getting really busy there, and they decided they needed someone who could work more hours, which I couldn't. I lasted there nearly 8 months. This was a record for me.

So other than a 2 week stint at Dairy Queen, from which I was fired, my last job in high school was at Indian Wells Golf Club, just north of Burlington.

This job was Awesome. I worked as a server, either in the snack bar or on the 9th hole. And if there was a banquet we got to wear little black skirts and tuxedo tops and serve there.

The hours were crazy, often we had to start at 5:30 in the morning. I used this to my advantage though, I would just not go home after partying all night and go straight to work. Tell my parents I slept on the couch so they didn't hear me come in and leave. Worked like a charm. I even managed to convince the cook I usually worked with to punch me in and cover for me so I could come in around 7:00 instead. He was willing as long as I covered for him later on in the day and let him take a nap. Being unsupervised is great.

And the tips were great too. I often could go home with a couple hundred dollars in my pocket after one shift. Problem was though, this was when I was getting heavy into the drugs, so it mostly went to pay for my habit. I had fun while I was doing it though.

I got Joanne a job there and made friends with the rest of the staff. We had a great times after hours hanging out, even while we were working. I won't tell you what some of the cooks did to the food, it may keep you from ever eating out again, but I can tell you they did not put up with guys that got too fresh with the girls there.

I actually stayed at the job till the end. The club closes after Christmas, and by the time it re opened in the spring I was already moved out of the house, living in Oakville without a car and could not get there. Otherwise I would have gone back for sure. They even asked me to be a manager that year. I think I really would have loved that.

Instead I got a job at CIBC. That hell lasted 15 years. What a waste.